No free rides for babies at Heritage Classic: Report

The overlords at the National Hockey League finally took a stand against the ultimate freeloaders in modern society – babies.

Originally reported by CTV News, Clifford Anderson and Shalyn Meady dropped $800 on two Heritage Classic tickets to see the Winnipeg Jets and Edmonton Oilers play outdoors. They assumed they could bring their six month old baby as a lap guest; as they’re able to do at Jets and Winnipeg Blue Bombers games (whose home field will host the game).

Just to be sure, the parents reached out to the Jets and then the NHL. That’s when the hammer came down.

They were told to buy another seat at $400 for the tyke who can’t sit up on his own.

The parents were taken aback by this decision. They wanted to experience the event as a family, but will not be able to due to the cost. Instead of accepting financial assistance from others to purchase the ticket, the family went to the media in the hopes of getting the policy changed.

For now, these damn drooling millennials always looking for a handout will have to find their free hockey elsewhere. Old man NHL is keeping them off their lawn!

The NHL has not responded to a request for comment on the ticket policy at the time of publication.